October 19, 2011

Penultimate Post

Penultimate means “next to the last”. So this is literally the second to the last post that you’ll be reading on this blog. The goal of this blog is to bring me and my lover Oreo closer to each other and it was never achieved. So I guess, the end of our relationship means the end of this blog as well.

As much as I wanted to give you a happy ending to the whole Elmer & Oreo relationship, it didn’t happen. Our relationship ended after two years of keeping in touch. It ended the day I met him, after two years.

Here’s what happened.

Oreo arrived October 2, 2011 and since then, he never texted me. I called him multiple times ever since he arrived but whenever I get hold of him, he’s either busy, sleepy (due to a drinking session), or he simply doesn’t answer the call. So I gave him two weeks for his friends and family.

After two weeks, he texted me. I thought he’ll meet me finally to have our private moment but he’s just instructing me to send him my “utang” (borrowed money) via M Lhuiller. I got mad and replied that I supposed to give it to him personally, which was our arrangement when I borrowed the money. So he agreed to meet me last October 14.

Before I even met him that day, I was already determined to break up with him because he’s totally ignoring me during his whole vacation. I felt left out. However, he brought along one of his friends during the meeting. I felt awkward to tell him how I wanted to break up with him because his friend doesn’t give us time alone. So I decided that I’ll just tell it to him next time we meet. So the meeting was business as usual. I paid him my loan, had some coffee with Oreo and his friend, chit chat, and gave him my gift. I never felt the urge to kiss him that day.

The-End

Last October 16, I just found out that he’s back in Saudi! I felt really mad that he didn’t even said goodbye properly. So I sent him this letter via FB and email telling him that I’m breaking up with him:

October 16, 2011 – 11:34 PM

Oreo,

Naguguluhan talaga ako sa takbo ng utak mo. Una, sabi mo 1 month ang vacation mo. Tapos nung nagkita tayo sa Megamall, sabi mo Monday ang lipad mo papuntang KSA. Sunday palang ngayon, pero nakita ko sa FB mo na nasa KSA ka na. Parang walang natupad dun sa mga sinabi mo ah.

Akala ko ba we would spend some time sa Sogo near Trinoma? Initially nga sabi mo sa EDSA Horizon Hotel. Tapos ngayon nasa KSA ka na. Sayang, ‘di ko tuloy nasabi sa ‘yo personally na I’m breaking up with you.

Sasabihin ko sana last Friday nung nagkita tayo sa Megamall. Nung nasa FX ako, iniisip ko na kung pano ko sasabihin sa ‘yo na makikipag-break na ako sa ‘yo. Kaso, nagsama ka naman ng tropa mo. Nag-alangan naman akong makipag-break sa ‘yo sa tapat ng tropa mo. So akala ko, you would push through sa original plan mo na Sogo. At least, kung natuloy yun, nasabi ko sana sa ‘yo personally and I don’t need to tell it to you via email.

Kaya nung nagkita tayo sa Megamall, I can’t even kiss you, kahit sa cheeks. Di ko magawang halikan ang isang tao na ‘di ko na mahal, as boyfriend. I already considered you as an ex-bf and as a friend nung nagkita tayo sa Megamall. We don’t kiss our friends di ba? Lalo na sa lips.

Anyway, since nandyan ka na ulit sa KSA, sa FB at email ko na lang sasabihin sa ‘yo. I’m breaking up with you, again, with finality. Actually, nung mga bandang June pa ‘ko nakapag-move on thinking na hindi na tayo. I just gave you a second chance nung sinabi mo sa FB na tayo pa. So I gave you your second chance thinking na ‘pag bumalik ka this October, I might love you again.

Pero ano ginawa mo? You blew it up big time. You spend two weeks with your friends, drinking to your heart’s content. I’ve called you 4 times and you just ignored it. I texted you multiple times and even filed all my remaining leaves for you but you never bothered to give me a day of your hectic schedule. Tapos gusto mo pa, ipadala ko sa ‘yo via MLhuiller yung utang ko para ‘di mo talaga ako makita during your entire stay here in Manila.

Ano ba ginawa ko sa ‘yo to treat me this way? Ano ba kasalanan ko sa ‘yo? Hindi talaga kita maintindihan. Ganun ba kasama ang childhood mo at gusto mong gumanti sa mga taong nagmamahal sa ‘yo? I really don’t get it.

Baka naman gusto mo pang itanong sa ‘kin kung bakit ako nakikipag-break sa ‘yo? For obvious reasons that you’re not treating me as a boyfriend and you’re no longer in love with me. Pero I’m not the bitter type of ex-boyfriend naman. I would still thank you for all the things you’ve done for me. The greatest of which is natuto akong mag-blog because of my love for you.

Baka naman akusahan mo pa ako na may iba na kong boyfriend or mahal. Kapal naman ng mukha mo kung yun ang iniisip mo. I can proudly say to everyone that you’re still my last kiss and my last sex. Yun nga lang, that was two years ago.

Oreo, thank you, for everything. Tulad ng lagi kong sinasabi sa ‘yo, I will always love you, the same way that I always love all my ex-bfs. I love you all as friends. BTW, I’m giving you the benefit of replying to his email first before I publish this to our blog.

Your ex-bf,

Elmer

I gave him enough time to respond to the email and my FB message but he never replied. I can see that he’s online in FB but he doesn’t chat with me. So I never got to hear his side of the story and I never got the chance to publish his reply here in our blog (or should I say my blog).

I did undergo the 5 Stages of Grief (Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance) for the loss of my love for Oreo. I can say that I have accepted what happened. I am now ready to move on. Thus, I can now publish this penultimate post.

My last post would be a link to a new blog. A blog dedicated to me and about me. I won’t tie my future blog to someone so that I don’t have to undergo this process again. Hope to see you guys in my next blog and I thank you all for being with me for the past few months.

Another thing that happened to me because of this blog is that I met new friends: fellow bloggers and readers.

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